"Free Yourself From Mental Slavery" Bob Marley

Have you ever had one of the moments where you did something and the moment after you were just able to breathe a little better?? I just had one of the moments and it came from me deactivating my Facebook account. I feel like it was just something that honestly helped strengthen all the chains and things binding up my thoughts. I used this metaphor to describe why I wanted to remove some people from my friends list but in the end it helped me justify to myself why there was no time like the present to let go of facebook...here it is: "If a crack addict was trying to stop using crack and free themselves from their addiction, would they throw away all the drugs and disconnect from all their dealers but keep the crack pipe?" Facebook was my 'crack pipe.' It was the tool I used to feed my addiction(s) and now that I have officially thrown away my 'crack pipe' I feel like I can truly move on from everything that I was trying so hard to just keep myself and my thoughts away from.

I just think it's important that we do free ourselves from those things that just seem to engulf us..those things that we feel are, or have determined to be, negative. I am my own worst critic and you wouldn't believe the things I beat myself up over. Instead of just walking away and learning from my mistakes, I just revisit the situations in my mind and beat myself up a little better than the time before. There is no progress in that and at this point in my life I'm interested only in PROGRESS. I'm desperate to move on past undergraduate and get into the world and start putting things into motion that will help me fulfill my overall purpose on this earth. It's good that I self-evaluate but I shouldn't beat myself up. I should self-evaluate for learning purposes only because re-evaluation doesn't get you anywhere closer back to the point in time your evaluating...it doesn't get you any closer to changing what has already occurred.

When your mind is being enslaved it adds a weight that you don't need added to the load you are already carrying. You can have an open mind but if there are chains hanging from your mind, you are bound to get caught up on something. So it just holds you up as you walk along your path. It's unnecessary and once you take the action to free your mind, the effect of that freedom is almost immediate. It's literally like you can just breathe a little bit easier. I find joy knowing that I will be breathing a little bit easier tonight when I lay my head down. My Facebook just became something that I would never intended for it to be, so even though I was able to keep in touch with my close friends because I'm not a big talker on the phone, it still had parts that kept my mind stuck in the prison that I was allowing it to sit in.

I just think it was a step in a good direction. I don't miss it. I wonder if I start to but either way I know that it was definitely a step in the right direction.

Really..."FREE YOURSELF FROM MENTAL SLAVERY, NONE BUT OURSELVES CAN FREE OUR MINDS!" -BOB MARLEY ....He was really onto something...he was onto a lot of things in my opinion and you can learn more than a few truths from the man.

Peace and Much Love,
Jessalaine

Solomon's Song

I read the Song of Solomon (a book in The Bible) yesterday and just thought it was beautiful...as beautiful as the spontaneous conversation that put me on to this book in The Bible. The whole book is basically a love song that Solomon wrote to his Beloved. This part that I really like is the Beloved's (Solomon's Number One) discussion of a dream she had, during one of the periods of separation that they experienced. Here it goes in the New International Version:

Song of Solomon 3:1-5

1 All night long on my bed
I looked for the one my heart loves;
I looked for him but did not find him.

2 I will get up now and go about the city,
through its streets and squares;
I will search for the one my heart loves.
So I looked for him but did not find him.

3 The watchmen found me
as they made their rounds in the city.
"Have you seen the one my heart loves?"

4 Scarcely had I passed them
when I found the one my heart loves.
I held him and would not let him go
till I had brought him to my mother's house,
to the room of the one who conceived me.

5 Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you
by the gazelles and by the does of the field:
Do not arouse or awaken love
until it so desires.

For Real, this passage is so AMAZING to me...I think it's beautiful and poetic and speaks on the human Love that you can't really find a story about anywhere else in the Bible. Song of Solomon might be one of my new favorite books in the Bible. I read the Bible to learn, but learn how it can be applied or compared to a situation that I may be experiencing. My Mom always said "There's nothing new under the sun." So I figure, the Bible is probably the best guide to navigate through all the madness.

Enjoy.

Peace&Much Love, of course,
Jessalaine :)

SIDENOTE: Right now, I'm listening to "Let's Get Lifted" by John Legend...and I think it's quite appropriate in relation to this post. and "Show You How" by The Killers followed....ha. Love that song...it's a great song.

Everyone Has Strength

One message that has been the loudest in my life over the last few months is that EVERYONE IS IN A BATTLE. Some people have a "one battle load" though, I feel most carry a "two or more battle" load. I feel though our own personal battles may seem greater than another person's...in reality they probably weigh the same. Each battle is proportionate to the load that we can bear. God (or your higher being) never puts more on us than we can bear...so any battle that we come to is probably going to be heavy enough to feel...it is going to test our strength. It's going to stretch our strength to it's maximum, but the result is ALWAYS greater strength.

LOOK AT IT THIS WAY:
When you are trying to build muscle, we go to the gym. We lift weights. Lifting weights makes little tears in our muscles and stretches our muscle. Our muscles recover, you know do their whole biological rebuilding thing, and in that healing process the result is a bigger muscle.
((Hopefully that makes sense....I promise I learned this in physiology in high school, and I got a 98% or better in that class both semesters...GOOGLE it if you don't believe me!))


Realizing everyone you encounter is fighting some battle that you may or may not never know about is really beneficial in building relationships with people. It helps make you think twice about any lashing out that you would do because of your personal battle, because it just wouldn't be right, or make any sense, to add a petty issue to the load that someone else may be carrying or to your own personal load. It's also great to find a person that you are comfortable discussing your battles with, in turn making them comfortable to share their battles with you. And before you know it, you are a building a small army to help conquer the battles you are facing or will face.

IN OTHER WORDS:
LOVE THY NEIGHBOR.
---> as hard as that may be sometimes, it's done as easy as it is said. and it always comes back around.


Peace&MuchLove
Jessalaine

WOWSER

"Security and time are the sexiest things that you can give to a woman." -Kanye West


http://bossip.com/76535/exclusive-pt-1-kanye-religion-is-like-branding/#more-76535

Hope Floats, Faith Grows

Life is truly like a Slide Show. (INSERT "T.I ft. John Legend - Slide Show" HERE) Lately I've just started thinking about EVERYTHING I experienced in the past year. Sometimes it just straight up exhausts my mind because in some situations I'm STILL trying to figure out where these experiences have left me. I've been able to recognize some if not all lessons that maybe I was supposed to take out of those experiences. Which is great because it's like I see a tell all snapshot of my 'self' and I'm able to acknowledge what I should change and what I should do the same if there is anything. Because of the lessons I'm grateful beyond words for all the experiences. However, I think it is safe to say that some things from the experiences still HAUNT me. And all I want is to get the conclusion that I need to no longer be haunted.

I will say that I am optimistic that my deliverance will come...that I will get the conclusions I seek and that I will be better off...I'm not scared of what the conclusions may bring, just more anxious to reach those conclusions.

Everyday my faith grows. And because of the way life treats me, its so hard for me understand how people go through everyday without any kind of faith. I couldn't make it without my faith and I try and feed my faith whenever possible...so that it will grow, so that it will be more than enough to get me through whatever situation I may face.

More than ever, I get what they mean by hope floating. I always considered myself a hopeful person...hopelessly hopeful for that matter. In two situations that I carried around on my heart for the longest, I eventually lost the hope...buried the hope even. I just figured each one was beyond repair. It's like I got to the point that I felt that things could never be restored to the way that they were or the way they should be...so why not just 'blow it all up.' I think that would have worked if I didn't care so effin much for the people involved in each situation. So because I never stopped caring for them...it's like when I got back to Columbus...the scene of the crimes...eventually the hope started to creep back up to the surface. So many people, places, and things take me back to the better times I experienced with them and so it's like now more than ever...in my heart I really want the record just to be set straight. I'm not sitting here thinking that the relationships I shared with these folks will be restored...but I do think that they can have the conclusions that they need and these folks can know that I see and understand everything that I did wrong, the things that I did that probably hurt them and how truly sorry I am for that....because hurting them was the last thing that I wanted to do. I always had good intentions...I just made bad decisions and didn't pay enough attention to maybe how my decisions would be perceived and absorbed by them. Like I said, as I sit here and write this I'm not thinking that everything will be restored to the ways that they were...but I do have hope that it will make things better...for me, for them...hopefully.

All of this weighs on my heart on top of the other things that my heart deals with daily. How do I get through it? I honestly just believe CONFIDENTLY that God didn't bring me THIS FAR to leave me...and everything I went through and that I'm going through is only happening because He said so. Everyday my faith grows, everyday I see my hope float.

Peace&MuchLove
Jessalaine

This used to be (and really still is..) my SHIIIITTTTTT, truth. truth. truth.

Words that still hold true today. ...Remember, music is more telling than logic. I remember riding around in my lil camaro bumping this song after school, riding home at nights just singing this ish at the toooppp of my lungs. (by myself...because I had a CURFEW...i def. pushed the envelope as much I could w/ the curfew but still was ALWAYS the first to PEACE out, lol) I really felt it, I still do....


SIDENOTE: The official Video for this song is tyyyyyyte. I first heard about this song via TRL, back when Music Videos ruled the world and it was one of the main ways peeps heard about music, check it out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8NDQls3_kc

Here are the lyrics: http://www.metrolyrics.com/shit-on-the-radio-lyrics-nelly-furtado.html
Because the words, are what I'm truly in love with. (Disclaimer: It was a fan that wrote these lyrics out I'm sure, everyone's ear is different, so if you prefer just watch the official video and listen for yourself loves)

Dedication, ANG. However, I hope others hear these words...that I feel could be taken right out of my Heart.

Peace&MuchLove,
JessalaineJessalaine
:)

SIDENOTE, simply brought to you by procrastination, lol

Let inspiration take the place of aspiration. All unemployment would cease. I always have plenty of work to be done and always pay My workpeople well.
--Two Listeners

This was my iGoogle homepage's Reminder From God. Haha, it made me not feel so guilty about writing in my blog instead of these papes (that's not a typo, i'm referring to my papers as pApes...lol, "street" terms applied to my hustle, college) that I need to be writing.

Peace,
J.E.

Waxing Poetic....a humble attempt

(Note: I never share my 'poetry.' I don't think I'm a poet with my words, rather I lace my prose with eloquence..or try to. However, there are those moments, where prose won't do and my pencil hits paper and produces a 'poem.' LEAVE YOUR FEEDBACK YO!)

Peace&MuchLove
JessalaineJessalaine

"For My Lost Ones"

I'm just letting go

For Once Without Anger

I'd prefer to be a stranger

Really need to close my eyes

Forget the lies, Fuck the Lies

Fuck the Tries, Forget the tries

Forget the truth...Truth forsaken

Far too long, my eyes remained open

Building this burden, building this Burden

Too scared to shut them

Still my eyes I can't condemn

Yet unsure of what's to blame

The Love of the Game?

The Images on Exhibition?

All just wasted convictions, that lead to no Conviction.

So to let go of the Fears

I released some of my Tears.

Never knew that to get by

I would have to cry...

Cry

For the memories lost

Sold at an unfamiliar cost

Cry

And steady Pray on my mistakes stacked

For one chance to take 'em all back

Wonder what took so long

Believing I had to stay strong

Believed my eye had to be on the Prize

Though it cared more about its Disguise

Still had to let go of my Tears

To finally release the Fears

I had to let go

(c) j.e.l